you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Randomize
