im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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