i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Little spoons don't ask big questions
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
Randomize
