Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
