Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Randomize
