Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
He kissed a someone with a penis
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
I'm at about main and main street
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Randomize
