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• (615): View more from Tennessee

  Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?

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• (513): View more from Ohio

  I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.

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• (914): View more from New York

  For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.

  (1-914): View more from New York

  That's cute.

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one

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• (714): View more from California

  i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?

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• (973): View more from New Jersey

  "can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time

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• (415): View more from California

  White people are beatboxing! Save me.

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• (801): View more from Utah

  I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself

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• (574): View more from Indiana

  just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"

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• (586): View more from Michigan

  woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.

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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?

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• (719): View more from Colorado

  you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.

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• (604): View more from British Columbia

  There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice

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