That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
