I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Randomize
