i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
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