are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
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