bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
She is in my trunk
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
