TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
