Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
