Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
should my penis look like a turkey
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Randomize
