Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
