There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
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