im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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