It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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