so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
