I feel like abortions should bother me more
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
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