her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
