She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Actions speak louder than pants.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Randomize
