Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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