Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
