she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
