sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize