i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Randomize
