I hate your face
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
