Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
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