hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize
