If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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