have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
