If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
