I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
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