My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize
