420 ftw
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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