just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Randomize
