What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
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