We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
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