Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
Randomize
