she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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