one word: firstdatebathroomanal
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
