OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Randomize
