dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
