Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Randomize