not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
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