That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
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