she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
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