how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
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